Saturday, November 12, 2011

A Sweet Saturday Short

Welcome back for yet another short bit of fiction. For more sweet succulence return to the full link list.

This scene happens as Brice is waking up from a fall from Darius' horse.


Pain! Waves of it washed over her and her head felt like it was going to explode. Brice slowly became aware of the rest of her body and rapidly regretted the discovery. Every bone and joint hurt.
“Brice.” A warm male voice tinged with an accent spoke from somewhere above her. Turning her head toward the sound, pain erupted behind her eyes. Taking a sharp breath of air, she realized yet another agony as her chest screamed at the motion. She must have cried out at the pain for the voice spoke again, “Hush, little bird, hush.” Large hands enclosed her ribs and began carefully outlining each with their fingertips. “No,” the man decided, “None are broken.”
“Brice.” One of the hands touched the side of her face. She had a strong feeling she knew the name of the man, but she was too tired to think now, too sleepy. “Brice,” the voice insisted. “Open your eyes.”
Slowly she obeyed and instantly regretted it. The world outside was bright and it increased the throbbing behind her eyes.
“Good,” the voice encouraged. “Now keep them open until the healer comes. That fall might have done some serious damage.” Ever so slowly, Brice focused her eyes on his face. Darius. She smiled. How could she have forgotten Darius? He loomed over her like a dark thundercloud. Her brain told her she should feel fear at being so helpless and at his mercy, but strangely, she did not.
“Brice.” Darius' voice interrupted her thoughts. “I need you to work with me.” She turned her head very slowly until she could meet his eyes. He was kneeling at her side. Once her eyes were on his face, he asked, “Can you move your legs?”
“I can feel them.” She closed her eyes, concentrated, and willed her legs to move. Pain shot up her left leg and her ankle throbbed, but they moved. “I think my ankle is twisted.”
“I brought the healer,” Ewian announced from the other side of the clearing.
Darius slowly rose from his knees and turned to greet the man still out of Brice's vision. “I have not moved her,” Darius informed the healer. “She has struck her head, bruised her ribs, and possibly sprained her ankle.”
“How many times do I have to tell you, Darius?” A short older man came to stand at her side across from Darius. “I like my job and I cannot keep it if you keep diagnosing my patients. Now shoo.” Waving a hand at the two warriors, he looked down and smiled at her. Brice found herself smiling back despite the pounding in her head and the dull ache that hummed through the rest of her. “Now, you must be Brice. I am Kurt.”


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Have a sweet and relaxing Saturday.


Sherry Gloag said...

May sound wierd, but I love your description of her pain, and the comaraderie between Darius and the doctor.

Sandy Nachlinger said...

I agree with Sherry. Lots of great detail showing Darius's physical and mental reactions to her fall. Great description.

Sophia Rose said...

I was having empathy pains from the description. I have had a similar experience and you described it well.

Thanks for sharing!

sue said...

never diagnose if not your job lol - excellent descriptions

Marsha Ward said...

Echoing the others' comments. You've written excellent descriptions here, Rachel. So much so that I have to go take some Ibuprofen now! LOL!

Rachel Rossano said...

I know what you mean, Sherry. :) I love the interactions between Darius and Kurt, too. :)

Thank you, Sandy, Sophia, Marsha, and Sue.

mirriamsmyth said...

I agree with everyone here. The description is excellent, and the camaraderie is smooth and believable. And I laughed at Kurt's response to Darius' pre-diagnosis. :)

Joyce DiPastena said...

Love the tenderness he displays for her. And I love the way the healer "shoos" the warriors away. Instant characterization, wonderfully done!