Saturday, June 2, 2012

Sweet Saturday Sample

Welcome to this weeks Sweet Saturday Sample! This week is another section from my current WIP, Duty. I hope you enjoy it. Comments are welcome. Since it is a WIP and in rough draft form, please ignore any typos or rough spots. All of it is subject to change. :)

~~~~~

“The little dears asleep?” Rolendis’ voice at my shoulder made me jump. I spun around faster than wise and almost collided with Rowen and the tray of breakfast leavings.

Rolendis eyed Rowen for a moment before focusing on me once again. Her expression oozed concern and sweetness. I resisted the urge to cringe.

“They are sleeping.” My instinct nagged at me that she was up to something.

“Are you going to leave them? I can sit with them if you wish.” Her smile widened into a forced grimace.

“No, thank you.”

“I am going to stay with them,” Rowen said before I could come up with a better reason for declining.

Rolendis sniffed at Rowen, nose in the air, and looked her up and down. “And you are?”

Tomas’ mother answered in completely reasonable terms. “I am the children’s nurse. We simply stepped outside to speak without waking the children.”

Rolendis apparently didn’t know what to do with the discontinuity of a servant who spoke as an equal.

While she struggled to find the right response, Rowen handed the tray to me. “I will remain, my lady.” Without waiting for my reply, she ducked back into the room, closed the door, and locked it.

“Is there anything else you need?” I asked.

Rolendis still stared at the closed door. “Did she bring news?”

“Of what?”

“Irvaine.” She glared at me as though I was being purposefully obtuse. I wasn’t.

There were so many things that we were waiting to hear about: Loren, Wisenvale, Quaren, the battle. I was as eager for news of Tomas’ safety as I was for Loren’s, but there was none.

“He sent none.”


“Not even in the note?”


~~~~~

What was your favorite sentence?

Thank you for stopping by.

For more Sweet Saturday Samples: http://sweetsatsample.wordpress.com/

5 comments:

Creations by Laurel-Rain Snow said...

My favorites were the first two sentences.

They set the scene and grab my interest.

Thanks for sharing...and here's MY SWEET SATURDAY SAMPLE

Mirriam Smyth said...

What note? How does Rolendis know about it? Hmm... I'm not sure I like Rolendis. Intriguing sample.

Sandy Nachlinger said...

My favorite was: Rolendis sniffed at Rowen, nose in the air, and looked her up and down.
Good description. I can visualize this perfectly!

Anonymous said...

Duty has piqued my curiosity. I'm looking forward to reading it!

I am confused about the characters, though. Who's who?

Katie

Rachel Rossano said...

Thank you, Laurel, I like them too. :)

Mirriam, I didn't include the note in this section, but it was innocent enough. :) Of greater significance is the fact Rolendis knew about the note at all. :)

Oh, thank you, Sandy. I did have fun with that one. :) Rolendis is such a fun character to write because she is so theatrical.

Hi Katie, I am sorry about the confusion. I forgot to give my usual introduction when I was scrambling to get the excerpt up this morning. The point of view is Brielle's in the first person.

Rolendis (who is getting a name change eventually) is the widow of the man who held the title of Lord Irvaine before Brielle's husband.

Rowen is Brielle's mother-in-law, but Rolendis doesn't know that yet.

I am so glad you are interested in "Duty." I am working hard on getting the first draft finished and the story moving toward print.